Chapter 5

Chapter 5 Excerpt – Forgive, Accept and Release

Remember, you can’t change the past, you can’t predict the future.
Mistakes will have been made, forgive yourself and others. In retrospect, you will always come up with something that you could change.

Accept that EVERYONE involved did the best that they could, regardless of whether it was what you wanted, what you would have done or what you think should have happened.

Think about “assuming positive intent.” Go back and give the people involved the benefit of the doubt, even if it’s difficult. Anytime you have more than one person involved in any decision, there is the possibility (or should I say probability) of different opinions. Expect it, work with it, work thru it. Don’t let this transitory situation destroy relationships for the future.

Finally, mentally release your baggage – let go of the guilt, disappointment, remorse. Once it’s done, it’s done.

As Abraham Lincoln said, “With Malice toward none, with charity for all,…”

Over and over, I’ve had seniors tell me that they don’t want to be a burden to their families. They don’t want to be responsible for their kids fighting, they just want to live out what’s left of their lives in peace. They have worked hard and deserve that. Your senior would not want to be the cause of any pain to others.

Behave in a way that will make you proud and make your senior proud! Rise above negative emotions as best you can. Will it always be easy? Heck, no! But you can try! Take solace in knowing that you’ve tried. (Finally, for a few more ideas and suggestions, check out the Family Caregiving website: